Starting Something New
One of the greatest paradoxes of my life is loving the outcome of trying new things, and simultaneously being terrified of the process. It’s probably the fact that I’m a perfectionist that makes trying new things so difficult. It’s not that I’m afraid of starting, it’s more that I’m afraid of being bad at it.
At the same time, I would be lying if I didn’t say that my best memories and experiences have come from starting new things. Be it something small like trying a new hobby, or something big like moving to a new city, wonderful things have come from taking that leap. And yet, no matter how many times I’ve done it, starting new things feels like an impossible challenge. Every time.
It’s easy for me to get caught up in what’s comfortable. I mean, I LOVE my comfort zone. I could live there forever, happily protected from challenge and change. But in my experience, if I’m not careful, the comfort zone can turn into comfort quick sand. The longer I stick around, the harder it is to get out.
Lately, I feel like I’ve been stuck in a sand trap season. Shying away from things that could bring joy and growth, in fear of failure and inadequacy. Instead of focusing on the wonderful possibilities that starting something new can bring, I fixate on what could go wrong, how I could fail, and the idea that I’m not enough. The danger of this mentality is that it becomes paralyzing. Before long, I’m afraid to act. When so many things could go wrong, where do you even begin?
These are the seasons where I have to rely on faith and trust in the purpose that God has laid out for my life. Although trying new things can be terrifying, I can be confident knowing that he is with me every step of the way. When I’m tempted to let fear have free reign, I find myself looking for scriptures that remind me of what’s true. Even though branching out is intimidating, I don’t have to be afraid because God goes before me in every season.
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
isaiah 41:10
For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.
2 timothy 1:7
If I’m being completely honest, reading these verses once is not an immediate cure all. I have to repeat them like a mantra, over and over until I fully absorb the truth in it. It’s not perfect. Everyday is a learning process. I’m learning to put my faith in God and through that, learning to put faith in myself.
I’m not saying that I’ll never be afraid again. It would be unrealistic of me to assume that it’s possible to instantly and completely eradicate an emotion. I’m just saying that I won’t let it continue to control me.
Starting new things is exciting. It leads to growth and it makes life interesting. Starting something new won’t be perfect, but there’s beauty in the learning process. There is so much that we can learn about ourselves, our capabilities, and our personalities. Stepping out of my comfort zone also gives me a chance to trust God, to get to know him better, and to put my faith into practice.
Starting new things will probably always be scary for me at first. But there’s a thrill in it too. There’s also a profound sense of peace that comes with knowing that I’m not alone as I stumble forward on the path of life.
I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all of my fears.
psalm 34:4
Just as I am hyping myself up to launch this blog, I encourage you to step out. Try that new hobby, apply for the dream job, get the risky haircut! It’s ok to be afraid. Just don’t let that stop you from being open to change.
Xx M
